Lao-Tze happened to be standing in his garden taking a pee as they walked up. He didn't bother to zip his fly.

"Sir, this is a friend of mine from California."

Lao-Tze shook the last drops off and extended his hand. "Welcome to the real Lotus Land, Mr. Wilson."

Li-Wu whispered something to Lionel Wilson and they exchanged looks, indicating confirmation for Wilson of promises made earlier by Li-Wu concerning the nature of their alpine host.

"Come on up," Lao-Tze said as he tucked his shriveled old penis away.

As they walked the flower-lined path, Lionel Wilson looked into the middle-distance and said loudly, "Nice place you got here."

Embarrassed, Li-Wu said, "You don't have to shout, Lionel. He's walking right next to you."

"Well, then," Lionel said, hitching up his Calvin Klein's. "You understand, Mr. Tze, you're the first client I've ever done business with whom I couldn't see. Oh, I've had a few in my day I wished I had never seen, and maybe one or two that I wasn't sure they were really there at all, if you get my drift. But you're the first, um, unseeable... Um. How's that for a title, Li? 'The Unseeables'?"

Lao-Tze seated his guests on the little porch with the big view and brought tea.

"Poppy tea?" Lionel laughed and took a large swallow. "Good stuff, whatever's in it, L.T."

Li-Wu shifted nervously. "Maybe you better get to it, Lionel. It's almost Lao-Tze's nap time."

"Lao, dude, let me put it to you this way. You're sitting on a gold mine here, I guess you know that. I mean, how many certifiably invisible people are there in the world? Not too frigging many, pardon my language. We get somebody to do the book--I know just the guy. Won the Pulitzer last year, and is 2-1 for the Nobel before the end of the decade. So. We do the book. I guarantee at least two big ones for the hardback. And it's gonna sell. I'd say it's better than even that we'll go five for paper. Then there's the movie, plus the ancillary shit, and the TV series..."

Lionel Wilson's eyes filled with light. "Jesus Christ! Why didn't I think of it before. I just got the title, Li, baby. 'L.T.' Get it? Playing off E.T., right? L.T., whose motto, if I followed you last night, is 'You don't need to call home because you're already there.' What do you think, Tzu? We on, or what? I figure nine figures for the package inside of two years. You--not to mention me--" George Belmont laughed, "will be set for life. No more ramshackle, well, let's say, picturesque mountain hut. No sirree. We'll get I.M. Pei--one of y'all's buddies, I believe--up here. Get him to cantilever a 4-2-2 right out over the chasm there. I know, Tzu, Li tells me you live alone but you're gonna be having plenty of guests soon enough. No more sleeping alone, right, Li?" Lionel Wilson laughed and slapped Li on the back.

Li raised his eyes from the ground and saw that Lao-Tze was doubled over with silent laughter.

"Well, um, what does he say," Lionel asked.

Tears were rolling down Lao-Tze's cheeks. His laughter was infectious, and Li couldn't help but smile, even as he blushed. Lionel Wilson took the smile as a statement of agreement.

"Great. We got a deal then. Let's split, Li, old man. I got a million things to do. Tell Tze we'll be back in three days with papers and shit for him to sign. And tell him for him, I've dealt with some big ones but he's world-class and then some." Lionel aimed his eyes again into the middle-distance. "Nice to meetcha, Lao. We'll talk. Let's go, Li." Lionel Wilson started off down the path, muttering to himself, making notes on a pad taken from his shirt pocket.

"Sir," Li-Wu stammered.

Lao-Tze was still laughing and waved him away, indicatng he should follow Lionel Wilson.

"Sir, please let me explain. My wife was diagnosed with cancer--"

That word brought new peals of laughter from Lao-Tze.

"Sir. Please. You do me wrong. You give me much pain."

This produced such a paroxysm of humor in the old man that Li-Wu thought surely he would have a heart attack.